Monday, May 2, 2022

Pivot

 There is always a pivotal person in life along/around whom one’s life circles around. Personal pivotal people shape not just thoughts and be just influential(negative/positive) but have great impact on habits and behaviors too.

To begin with, obvious enough, the first pivotal person would be the mother. Mother being the primary caretaker in most of the cases. Mother influences the eating habit in the first two to three years. Life generally revolves around her. Father bears the torch along with the mother for the next few years until the friends take over. Father and mother strive to set forth all habits and discipline into life. 

As we age into active school kid, transitioning the pivotal point of life from parents to friends goes mostly unnoticed as we still continue to stay with them/move away to new places/city. This is because life generally becomes more happening and more busy. The learnings and guidance of the parents continues to help us traverse through those years although the friends remain to be the  pivotal person.

Many Friends come and go along the school life, college days and office years- but only some give an unscratch-able impact in our lives. Influential , relaxing, toxic, - they give life lessons worth remembering and cherishing either way.

Along those youthful years, the one person who remains supplementary pivotal person; the one who cannot be disregarded for the influence and impact they create in our life. They add such  confidence and energy  to our life. Siblings are the secondary lifeline in this world of uncertainty.

Grandparents and cousins are the tertiary and rather summer vacation pivotal points in most cases. The school year revolves around waiting for that one month of summer vacations(read it as relaxation)  with them. 

Every pivotal point mentioned goes for a toss at one point of life. The current called marriage/partner sweeps you off your feet(both positively and negatively ;-) ). All the pivotal pillars seem like distant hallucinations when the current called marriage gets your family extended and transforms into rapids called children. Learnings and influence of the previous pivotal points stay as a lighthouse to guide and set up some influential pivotal points out of the new life and newly found relationships.Immaterial of the spouse being the pivotal point, one’s own child(ren) becomes the evident pivotal point. Life starts revolving around bringing them up. The responsibility and dedication drives the show. Eventually, it turns into obsession, governing all major decisions of life. They give meaning to the living and also drain and demand all the energy. This new pivotal point stays on for more years. These pivotal point(s) are special such that having a secondary or a  tertiary person in life becomes out of question during this period. It is 365*24 effort. Maintaining sanity and knowing the limits about getting drawn and eventually drowning into this relationship is prime.

Unlearning and overlooking the time, energy spent on them; staying emotionally independent when they are ready spread their wings while simultaneously caring and guiding them when they need us is walking on the thin line. 

The pivotal points along the way helps us steer our lives along the path - the path of happiness, path of learnings & balance and path of love. 


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